Someone asks you how to go through life, and there's two answers. There's "between a pair of Latin tits, drunk off your ass, with the Stones on blast and a Sam Peckinpah Western on the big-screen." And then, there's the fucking incorrect answer.
Send all love letters and mental health inquiries
"I don't know who 'Scott is NOT a professional critic' is, except that he claims to be a screenwriter and he thinks/dreams/obsesses about sex and '70s cinema a lot. I do know that he sounds . . . a little bit like Warren Oates in Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Garcia if Oates' character in that Sam Peckinpah film was an alcoholic USC film professor and a raving, saliva-spewing chauvinist dog."
—"Horndog Laureate," on Jeffrey Wells' Hollywood Elsewhere site, December 7, 2011